Thursday, April 30, 2009

John Williams A Capella Tribute



This guy reminds me of Andy from The Office.. hahaha... click on HQ for high quality sound..
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Beer Bottles Mario Song


Another oldie but goodie
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Virtual Barbershop - 3D Sound



This is awesome, it's kinda old but I still like to listen to it once in a while. This is based on holophonics... It is a recording made with two microphones that are placed the same distance as your ears. It's an awesome experience, even though my brain is doing all the work.

REMEMBER!! - wear headphones for the best effect!! I actually don't even recommend listening to it without headphones
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Flight Attendant rap


I know this is old, but I came across this again. I wish all my flights were like this..
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Pitcher of beer down in 5 seconds


This is sooo fake.. you can tell because the shadows are all wrong... hahaha
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Go Green Fail


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Another Parent Fail



Need I say more?
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Protect yourself from the Swine Flu with STYLE!



The WHO has raised the Swine Flu—which you can follow in this map or through Twitter—to alert level 5, which means a pandemic is imminent. Not funny. Some people, however, are having fun.

In Mexico everyone is wearing masks. People are getting bored of wearing the same thing, so they have started to decorate them in all kinds of styles. As you can see, many of them show their always ironic look at death and fascination with los muertos.

I BET you $723948223482398203794 dollars that someone's gonna make a Joker surgical mask.. forreals..



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Pizza Box... from the FUTURE!



Witness the magic of US Patent 7,051,919: The Pizza Box that Comes From the Future! It tears, it converts to plates, it folds, it saves the planet! Or something like that.

Called the Green Box, the top is perforated so it easily breaks into four plates in which you could serve everyone's favorite food. Meanwhile, the bottom is also perforated so you can fold it into a new box that conveniently fits in your refrigerator. This can't come soon enough, even while it will never serve any purpose in my home, where we fight to the death for the last slice.




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Hulu Wins TV on the Internet: Disney Officially Joins, Bringing ABC and Classic Movies



Disney has finally, officially joined Hulu as equity partner, meaning you'll be able to watch ABC shows like Lost, Grey's Anatomy, The View and lots more. Movies are part of the package too.

Now is clearly Hulu's time: It just became the third most-watched video site in the world a few days ago, and three of the four major broadcast networks stream their biggest shows (except, oddly, the reality programs) on Hulu. All that's missing is CBS.

The deal includes shows from ABC, ABC Family, ABC Daytime, SOAPNet, Disney Channel and "popular library titles from The Walt Disney Studios."


AHHH DISNEY!! I'm so excited.. finally i can avoid ABC's site which is soo slow and just get everything in the same place. woot!
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No Wash Boxers



No Wash boxers were designed by 29-year old medical student Rob Libfeld who claims he came up with the idea when he noticed how embarrassed patients in the hospital were of their soiled, all white underwear. As you can see, the $13 drawls are all yellow in the front and brown in the back, so you can piss and shit to your incontinent heart's content with little to no visible embarrassment. However, there will still be a smell, so be sure to look around quizzically to expel any blame.

No wash underwear hides stains, not odours

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Undercover Fail



Too bad all real undercover cars aren't like this one...
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Name Fail



There's no way that's a real name.. really?? hahhah sounds like a name like for those prank phone calls like Mike Rotch and Ben Dover
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Patience FAIL or pick-up line Win



hahaha I like how he's just hovering over the girl who's chugging a pitcher...
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Double Fail



Hahahaha, is it bad that i think it's hilarious when fat people face plant? actually i just think a lot of face plants are funny.. except when i face planted when i fell off the top bunk of a bunk bed.. but that's another story...

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Cat trying to sneak up on pigeon = grave disappointment



This cat tries to sneak up on a pigeon and then becomes a drama queen...

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4 Chords Song = Instant Classic



Axis of Awesome (which is an awesome band name btw..) have found the secret to a commercially successful song... Here they present a bunch of past songs that have used this formula and this video reminded me that people are just cattle. The music producers must be laughing their asses off about how they made so much money using the same routine.. kinda like the Disney video... pooo.. we've been swindled..

although i'm kinda disappointed that they forgot "No Woman No Cry" which should have definitely been in there...


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Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Amazing Footage!! Man saves animal!!



Discovery channel got this amazing footage in the heart of Africa. Watch and be amazed!!!


This is for you RYAN!! Follow in this man's footsteps and save the animals!!

This video is such a classic!! hahaha love it!
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FMLs all around!

Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball... right into her face again. FML

Today, I got a haircut. Right after the lady finished washing my hair she grabbed a towel to wipe her nose. She then proceeded to use the same towel to thoroughly dry my hair. FML

Today, I found out I have a restraining order against me from my ex boyfriend. Apparently, I drive by his house too much and it is considered stalking. He forgot that I live 2 houses down, and MUST drive by his house to get home. FML

Today, this guy I like let me wear his favorite baseball hat that he never takes off. I returned it to him later, only to find out I have lice. FML

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben & Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

Today, my mother sent a letter to my best friend trying to comfort her over the death of her mother. She signed the letter "LOL, Jen" thinking LOL stood for "lots of love." FML


Today, I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

Today, my teacher called me into his office so he that he could pass me some information for my project. Just as he plugged in my thumbdrive, he opened the folder named "School Work". That was the folder name I used to disguise my porn. FML

Today, I went up to a secluded mountain my boyfriend took me to for our first date. As I saw another couple hooking up in the bushes, I phoned my boyfriend to tell him someone found our secret spot. His Bob Marley ringtone started playing from the bush. FML

Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML

Today, I was making a nacho and grabbed some refried beans that were in a plastic container out of the fridge and put them on top of the chips. After I’m completely done eating my mom looks in the fridge and asked me if I knew where the cat food was. I just ate a small can of cat food. FML

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. His dog, Baxter, has a bad farting problem. I decided it would be okay to let a silent fart out and blame the dog. Baxter was outside when I blamed him. FML

Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML

Today, an ant bit my penis. That was the first 'mouth' to ever touch it. FML

Today, my family was talking about how people's hair goes gray when they get old. My grandma mentioned that she was initially attracted to my grandpa because of his red hair and was sad when it turned gray. "It's ok," she continued, "his pubic hair is still red." FML

Today, I went to a concert. They had this feature where you could send a picture of something from your cell phone and they'd put it on the big screens, so I sent a picture of myself in. When the picture came up on the screens, the entire crowd of about 4,000 people went, "Ewwww!" FML

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML

Today, I was at the beach and fell asleep in the sun. When I woke up, there was a blob of sunscreen on my leg. Thinking it was my boyfriend who was sweet enough to squeeze sunscreen for me, I rubbed it into my leg. After smelling my hands, I discovered it was bird poop. FML

Today, I was in the shower and had just finished washing my face. When I put the soap down I noticed a curly, black hair stuck to it. Im blond. The only other person who uses that bathroom is my uncle. I just rubbed my uncle's pubic hair all over my face. FML

Today, it was my birthday and everyone in the office chipped in to buy me a card, and nothing but a card. It had a pre-written message on it and a space to write "Love, *insert name*" where everyone signed their names. The "Love" was crossed out and replaced with "From". FML

Today, my boss confessed to me that she doesn't know how to change the staples in the staplers at work, so she just switches them when they run out. We work at an office supply store. She makes six figures. I make $10 an hour. And she just got awarded a trip to Aruba for doing a "great job". FML

Today, I was waiting for the train. It arrived, I got on and the woman behind me stepped on the back of my shoe. My shoe came flying off and landed in the gutter between the train and the platform. The doors closed, the train pulled away. FML

Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I proceeded to pee on myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML

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Who says trees don't have sex??



Trees are sexy...

Thanks Steph
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Adult Engrish


what is the fuck!? Hit the jump for more!


fun for the WHORE family...

ET is cracked out...

hahaha 999%

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Silly cute little animals...



That is hilariouss... doesn't even realize it's doing it..



I started immediately laughing when the video started... it looked like a stuffed animal at first... hahah that's classic


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Tuesday, April 28, 2009



This cover of Stand By Me was recorded by completely unknown artists in a street virtual studio all around the world. It all started with a base track—vocals and guitar—recorded on the streets of Santa Monica, California, by a street musician called Roger Ridley. The base track was then taken to New Orleans, Louisiana, where Grandpa Elliott—a blind singer from the French Quarter—added vocals and harmonica while listening to Ridley's base track on headphones. In the same city, Washboard Chaz's added some metal percussion to it.

And from there, it just gets rock 'n' rolling bananas: The producers took the resulting mix all through Europe, Africa, and South America, adding new tracks with multiple instruments and vocals that were assembled in the final version you are seeing in this video. All done with a simple laptop and some microphones.

I don't know about you, but it blew me away. Best version of Ben E. King's classic I've ever heard in my life. Group hug anyone??
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Flo Toilet makes pooping even more tiring..



This insane object is a fancy new toilet. It promotes pooping in a yoga-like fashion, squatting down to work on your ab and back muscles. Think it'll catch on??

The Flo toilet is an ergonomic, sustainable design concept for baby boomers that functions like a squat toilet. Designers maintain that using the Flo toilet is akin to yoga - by building and strengthening abdominal and back muscles. Only one-half to one gallon of water is used for flushing and The Flo reuses water from hand washing. To flush water from the tanks to the toilet, the Flo employs an electromagnetic ball valve. Go With the Flo also is free of mechanical parts. The toilet is fully self-sustaining and independent of electric power.


I can just imagine myself in the morning, all groggy and in a stupor, trying to squat and falling over in an epic toilet fail.. no thanks.. i'll just stick to normal toilets...
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Monday, April 27, 2009

Track the Swine Flu with Google Maps



Now you can track the swine flue with Google maps by going here. And if you haven't heard of the swine flu yet.. take your head out of the ground and read the news you hermit.. ahh i can't believe that a lot of the newest cases occurred in a high school that's right near where i live.. creepers!!
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Weird animal leg extensions



Personally, my regular legs are just fine. But for some people that's not enough, they want animal-like legs. These people are sickos.

These "digitigrade leg extensions" are the work of Seattle-based sculptor Kim Graham. Essentially a fancy pair of stilts, the legs mimic digitigrades (animals including horses that bear weight on their toes).


The video shows the legs in their natural, metallic finish, as well as dressed up in some fur. Which, I'll admit, was rather disturbing. Throw on a bearskin rug and TA-DA, you're that pedophilic creep Mr. Tumnus from that book about a talking panther in your closet.

A La Geekologie

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Mountain Dew 'Throw Back' with Real Sugar



Just for the summer (unless they're hugely popular) Pepsi is producing Mountain Dew and Pepsi 'Throwback', which both contain natural sugar instead of that high fructose corn syrup.

The first thing I noticed was how smooth the carbonated soda went down. It's not nearly as harsh as the standard type and I'm sure peeps who aren't avid Mountain Dew drinkers will appreciate the difference. Also, the aftertaste. It's more natural and clean. Hell, even my burps taste different. I LOVE IT.


What an advertising tact, selling different tasting burps...
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Limosine Fail



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Loris loves getting tickled...



hahahh this is what i look like when i shower.. i just clench my fists and look up at the ceiling with my arms way up..

From the uploader:

As cute as the slow loris is, it is considered an endangered species and not really suitable as a pet. Not only are they illegal to own, but they have sharp teeth and wild-like behaviors. For example, the loris marks its territory with urine... constantly... for the span of its entire life. This is not a habit that can be changed like house training a cat or dog.


hahah i like it's face... it kinda reminds me of one of my roommates.. who has some subtle rodent-esque features..

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Classiccc


Hahaha.. crazy old geezer.. this is a classic way to fail a sobriety test...

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Famous Failures


This video makes me feel better about my life.. =)
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Jamazinggg Beat boxing



This kid is amazing.. don't let his fobby accent fool you...
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Sunday, April 26, 2009

More Engrish!


Served with some pepper and assault - a penetrating aroma


thank you stayed here! hahahha


I always smile naturally.. =D






Introducing LeBorn James


I always try not to feed it...


hahhaha mickey morse...


just sad..


very friendly bread.. I buy this just to make myself feel better...



hahaa...gigle. gigle..


thanking!!


Deep impressions..








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Balls Fail!


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Pregnancy Fail #2!




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weird japanese commercial



haha if you watch this more than once.. it starts cracking you up... i like the way he held up his arms to concentrate the force...
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pretty much the story of my life




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The quirky origin of common phrases

An interesting article was written by Allison Ford...

For someone learning English, some of the hardest things to master are our many strange idiomatic expressions, which don’t make a lot of sense to someone who’s trying to translate them literally. Exactly why do we eat “humble pie” and why are special stocks called “blue chips”?

The Dog Days of Summer aren’t just those few weeks when the heat makes us pant like dogs. In fact, astronomers began using this expression in Roman times, when they noticed that the star Sirius, also known as the “dog star,” rose and shone with the sun from about July 3 to August 11. Scientists thought that when Sirius was in the sky along with the sun, it contributed to the intense heat of those “dog days.”

Since the time of early Scandinavians, we’ve called the period after a wedding a Honeymoon. According to tradition, the wedding couple was compelled to drink a fermented honeyed beverage for about a month after the wedding—from the time of one full moon until the next—for fertility and luck. This month of drinking and festivity was dubbed the “honeymoon.”

After the Moors invaded Spain in 711, proud aristocratic families took pride in their pure Spanish heritage and the fact that they never intermarried with the dark-skinned Moors. They called the proof of their racial purity sangre azul for the way their veins tended to look blue under their pale skin, earning anyone from a noble or patrician heritage the nickname Blue Blood.

When you eat Humble Pie, you’ve been proven wrong or have had to take back your words. As early as the 15th century, the entrails and leftover organs of animals were called “umbles,” and they were often baked into pies as a common peasant meal. The word “humble” developed separately, but since it means lowly or contrite, it morphed into “humble pie,” a dish eaten by the apologetic.

Hit the jump for more quirky origins




In feudal days, weddings were fraught with the real possibility that a rival lord would try to break up the ceremony and steal the bride. To prepare for a possible battle, a groom would ask a friend with fighting skills to stand with him during his marriage and act as his Best Man, helping to defend his bride from possible kidnapping. Often, grooms would convince multiple friends and relatives to stand with him, and several peasant maids would be persuaded to stand with the bride, in the hope that if invaders came to disrupt the ceremony, they would be confused by the plethora of girls, and possibly kidnap the wrong one. Think about that the next time you’re asked to be in a wedding party.

We sometimes say that someone in a state of suspense is On Tenterhooks. Tendere is a Latin word meaning “to stretch.” In Medieval Europe, freshly-woven bolts of cloth were dried on special racks so that they would not shrink or stretch. The racks were called “tenters,” and cloth was affixed with hooks, which is how the phrase “on tenterhooks’” came to connote being in a state of tension or anxiety.

Animals are oft-recurring characters in English expressions. In medieval times, unscrupulous vendors in the marketplace would sometimes substitute a cat when someone bought a piglet, putting the feline in a bag where its squirms would mimic the struggle of the pig. Once the buyer walked away, they would Let the Cat Out of the Bag, revealing the trickery.

Some claim that the expression Rule of Thumb originated with an English common law which stated that a man could not beat his wife with a branch any thicker than his thumb. Although that might be true, people have used body parts as standards of measure since ancient times. Feet, forearms, and finger lengths had been used in building, cooking, and brewing for thousands of years before the English solidified it into law, and the phrase “rule of thumb” has referred to a general, but imprecise, rule for the past few hundred years.



The phrase Armed to the Teeth comes from pirate times, when no one took the trouble to re-load guns, so pirates compensated by carrying as many weapons as they could handle—in their pockets, in their shoes, in their waistbands, and anywhere else they could fit one. To cap it off, many carried a knife or dagger in their teeth, since it was the only place left.

Also in ancient Rome, marble workers and craftsmen would sometimes cover up cracks and imperfections in their work with wax. Items that were whole and unblemished were, understandably, more valuable, so an artisan’s promise of sine cera, Latin words meaning “without wax” was an important personal and professional guarantee, and it’s why we now sign letters with the salutation Sincerely.

In the stock market, a Blue Chip stock is valuable and stable—a sure thing. In gambling parlance, different colors of chips are worth different amounts of money. Blue chips are the most valuable chips in casinos, and the phrase “blue chip” is used to describe any stock that’s unlikely to decline in value.

Crazy people are often described as being Mad as a Hatter. It’s not just a reference to Alice in Wonderland; up until the 19th century, milliners used large amounts of mercury in their work. After years of exposure, the hatters would sometimes develop symptoms of mercury poisoning, including aggression, tremors, and unpredictable behavior. Even today, mercury poisoning is sometimes called “Mad Hatter’s disease.”

The English language is full of strange phrases with unexpected origins. The next time it’s raining cats and dogs, batten down the hatches and burn the midnight oil with an etymological dictionary … you never know what sort of skeletons you’ll find in the closet.

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Mighty Atlas


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all the functions of a "Noteboek"


Noteboek from Evelien Lohbeck on Vimeo.

Who says notebooks are old-fashioned? This is the ultimate multi-purpose notebook.. I want.

Also, may I note (get it??!) that the macbook-esque notebook is running windows xp?? WTF?!

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how to make a baby.



This is an educational video made by Cassidy Curtis and Raquel Coelho. For all you parents out there.. here is an opportunity to skip that awkward birds and bees and where baby's come from conversations with your kids.. just show them this video.. if you catch your son trying to blow on a girl's finger.. then you can smack him.. (disclaimer: i do not condone domestic violence, by "smack" i mean blow.. and by blow... I mean smack)

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Cool: Zipper headphones



That was totally my idea!!! i had always thought that it was annoying that you can't really adjust headphones. When i'm by myself, i don't need the two wires to be separated that much, but with sharing (which is caring) sometimes the two wires can't be separated far enough.. well there goes my business plan #483 out the window..

The zipper keeps the headphones all neat and zippy and the zipper puller functions as a volume control.. i wonder if you can zip your headphones into your jacket zipper.. I call dibs!! Business plan #87539
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couples married dressed like shrek and fiona



My first reaction was... ew.. and wow that guy really does look like Shrek...
Hospice nurse Christine England, 40, married her fiance Keith, 44, in full costume and make-up in front of 100 guests who were also in fancy dress.


The new Mr and Mrs Green (yes, really), of Barnstaple, Devon, had spent three hours having their make-up done before walking down the aisle.

Christine said: 'The idea just came to me. I knew what we would go as because Keith looks just like Shrek.


ahhah that's just cruel.. calling your husband an OGRE... but it's ok.. at last he's not as ugly as this one
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Cat controlled wirelessly by evil printer



i don't know about you, but I think it's pretty cool that the cat can pop and lock in time with the beat of the printer

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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

THE BEST SONG EVERRR!!!!

OMG THIS IS THE BESTT SONG EVERR!!! definitely play with audio...




HAHHAHAHAHHAHHHA!!

fine fine.. i'll tell you the real story about this guy.. apparently he was an up-and-coming rapper who prefers to make his beats and melodies first.. then record.. and while listening to the playback, write lyrics to the music.. but apparently the pre-lyrics recording got leaked and the song got HUGE and was like a top 10 hit in the UK or something and he actually made a music video for it...

BUT i just like to think that he thought his song was the ish just the way it is... which he prolly does

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How to sneak up on a photographer




While trying to photograph some wildflowers in the park I turned around to find this little guy who had snuck up behind me to see what I was up to. I am sure he thought he was blending in unnoticed. Once he saw that I had spotted him he grabbed something up from the ground and acted as if he just happened to be there and was not looking at me!

(a recount by the author.. not me.. if it were me, it would have been much more action packed and exciting..i'm sure the squirrel would have had an uzi if it tried to sneak up on me... i have really bad experiences with squirrels.. they hate me)


Hit the jump for my pictures of the squirrel bastards




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iPhone App hids your snoring with office sounds



If you don't work at home where you can permanently doze or beat off undetected, iNap@Work provides audio camouflage of papers shuffling and click-clack typing. Ehh i'm more old-school.. like cutting a ping pong ball in half and drawing pupils with a black sharpie and setting them in my eye sockets (via Calvin)..

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Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Floating Cloud Sofa = Woozahh



The Cloud is a levitating sofa that floats thanks to magnets and, I suspect, a tiny wizard. Unfortunately, it's only conceptual. Which, for those of you who don't know what conceptual is, means really soft. You should buy one.

Cloud is a sofa concept designed for ultra comfort and relaxation. The soft floating upper part is supported by the magnetic force generated by the bottom base. No matter if you want to work and sit with comfort or simply a power nap to release the stress, you can always enjoy your time to relax on the floating cloud.


Designed by D.K. Wei (no relation to that barrel throwing bastard), the Cloud recently won honorable mention (3rd loser) in a relaxation design contest. Which, wait a minute, relaxation design contest -- WTF is that? Fifth of gin and a handful of Valium. BOOM, blue ribbon.

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Crazy sink drains onto the floor



This is the Abisko Washbasin from Eumar.. it's not even a basin.. it's a freaking waterslide!!... can I borrow anyone's hamster? I'll babysit.. just for a couple days...

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Engrish





Where do I enrist?? hahahhah




No really honey, I picked it up at the store.



i saw your sad... hahahhahha

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Don't come any closer or I'LL TURN OVER!!



Y 1,500 Boat comes back again



and then he had a nice strawberry sundae and a good beating...



Can I eat without paying money anything?



awww... i see your sad...



hahhahaha ok.. i can't even think of a caption for this one..




Makes for some interesting contact sports...
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